The Guard Had One Last Challenge… Then Everything Went Wrong
Two men are in the desert. Both are dying of thirst. Suddenly they see an oasis. Just as they are about to jump in, a guard appears and says: “To be able to bathe here, each of you must complete two tasks!”
The two agree, as their lives are at stake.
The guard says: “First, everyone must collect 100 pieces of fruit!”
The two of them set off quickly. After 20 minutes, the first one returns with 100 currants.
Then the guard said: “Now you have to stick them all up your @ss one by one, without laughing!”
The man starts immediately. At the 99th number, he begins to laugh himself silly. The guard asks: “Why are you laughing? You almost made it!”
The man replied: “Look, the other one has watermelons!”
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Three dwarfs want to get into the Guinness Book of Records.
The first one claims to have the smallest hands in the world.
The second one says he has the smallest feet in the world.
The third claims to have the smallest p*nis in the world.
So all three set off for the Guinness office. The first dwarf goes in and comes back a few minutes later cheering: “I’ve got the record, I really do have the smallest hands in the world!”
The second one goes in, and he too soon comes out beaming: “I have the record, I have the smallest feet in the world!”
Then the third dwarf goes in. After a few minutes, he comes back out angrily: “Do you know anyone named Dieter Bohlen?”
